3 minutes pass...
If you put an envelope between a starved bear on meth and fresh salmon, I think that is a fairly accurate depiction of what the envelope and letter looked like when I was finished with it.
Jenn: What are you doing?!
Me: Do yo know how to use this letter opener? I can't figure it out.
Jenn: [ look of disbelief ]
Hawk, that's a staple remover.
... painful, painful silence
Last time I checked, staple removers looked like giant snapping cobra teeth not letter openers.
Dear staple remover manufacturers,
I would like to subscribe to your newsletter; so that when you make such a radical (and unnecessary) change I wont feel like such an idiot when I'm apparently the only one unaware of the new design; and you can stop embarrassing me in front of my friends.
Morals of Post:
- Kids, stick with things you are good at. If you try new things you will most likely fail, be humiliated, and get laughed at. Simultaneously.
Laziness is a secret ingredient that goes into failure. But it’s only kept a secret from the person who fails.”
Shut up, Rob.
- "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that wont work."
- Thomas Edison
I knew I liked him for a reason...