Saturday, April 30, 2011

Mom, Pops, and Popcorn

Perks of catching a saturday matinee movie with the parental unit:

a.) free movie
b.) good times and epic company
c.) free popcorn
d.) supplied with at least a weeks worth of one liners

Two things happened having been born of parentals consisting of a hippie and a native american...

1. Accepting the fact that my parents will always be infinitely cooler than me.
2. Hearing "I would marry you just to be part of your family..." more times than I'd like to mention.

I met my parents at the theater and even before I could get a 'hello' this was the conversation I was greeted with:

Dad:  Hey Hawk, go over to the counter and tell them that you lost a dollar.

Me: [blank stare] Um, what the... why?

Dad: Because I just returned a lost dollar to them... they'll think it's yours.

Mom: [turning to my dad] Why did you return the dollar if you were just going to work even harder to get it back?

Welcome to my life.

We made it into the theater as the movie was starting, I jetted out for a minute to get some napkins (for our 90% butter 10% popcorn) and when I came back my dad was gone. I leaned over to my mom, "Where's dad?" My mom looked over raised her eyebrows and pointed in front of us. My dad was just chilling by himself in the row in front of us.

I leaned forward and whispered to my dad,

"Um sir, you here by yourself? ... What on earth are you doing?"

He got up and came back and said,

"When some giant comes and sits in front of you or some lady with huge hair gets in your way for the entire movie... don't come complaining to me."

Brilliant pops.

No really, brilliant.

Afterward, I took my parents out to one of my favorite restaurants. Now my parents are getting ready to remodel one of their bathrooms and this just so happend to be restaurant where this happened... so I recommended that my dad check it out and see if that might be a direction he would want to go with for the remodel.

Unfortunately, Rihanna didn't make the cut.

Moral of Post:

  • Family is:  risking looking like a creeper to ensure your offspring get the best seats. 

Remember when..