Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Voice Search

We went to the movies last night, but our show was sold out.

So we had to find out if the same show was sold out at the other theater in the next city over before we drove clear over there just to have it be sold out again. I was given the task to call them and find out.

I am always itching for an excuse to use my Google voice search app so I gladly accepted the challenge.

The only problem was that I kind of had anxiety every time I had to talk and ask for the number; and since it is still a Google search I found myself stuttering out random keywords and phrases to try and be helpful but ultimately it made no sense when it all came staggering out.

Meanwhile the poor poor Google search app tried desperately to understand what it was I was telling it to do.

Each time I tried to explain and casually tell it what to search for I ended up sounding like some foreigner trying to explain the history of cinematography in broken english. 

Addi: Hawk, will you find out if its sold out at the other theater?

Me: Absolutely!

[Fumbling around to open Google App]

Roughly this is what came out:

Me: Movie Theater. Time Showings. Number. Phone. Center. Cinemark. Times shown. (Pause to breathe) row seat....

Frustrated and slightly embarrassed as Addi and Libby glance over trying to figure out what on earth I had just said; I went for attempt number two.

Me: Movie listing number show times, cinemark. hotline... uh... assistance number? movie number. times....

I sheepishly look over only to see in Addi and Libby's eyes the regret of giving me the assignment in the first place.


Luckily I have friends that drop it and allow me some preservation of my pride and ego. Oh, wait....

Morals of Post:
  • Stupid Google. Why don't you have mind reading apps yet?! C'mon, pull it together.
  • I'm all about going green, don't get me wrong - but at least allow me the option to use paper towels in the bathroom. All air dryers prove is that I somehow still have soap on my hands after washing, and I will almost always end up with wet marks all over my back pocket and side of my pants no matter how long I stand in front of it.


  1. A. Glad your phone shows my previous text about Tmobile hiring homeless people to wear their cellphone costumes.
    B. "Where is the theater at?"
    C. I beat you, slowpoke!
    D. "There is no way out," says Buttercup, slightly lisping.

  2. There are certain things a person needs in life, and you NEED the Flixster app. Now.


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