Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Get Your Own Digeridoo!

I have been fighting getting sick for the past week now. By all means I really should be put in a plastic bubble with limited human contact because my immune system is pretty much non-existent. I'm 96% sure it is because I'm the runt of the family.

Don't get me wrong, I don't have it as bad as some critters in the animal kingdom where the runt not only is the most likely to get sick and die (as if that weren't enough to have to deal with) but also has the biggest threat of being eaten by a sibling or their own mother... thanks a lot "Animal Planet/Wiki/Google 'runt' search" for that unsettling tidbit and graphic visual. I'm just saying that I'm the one that can catch a cold from watching someone sneeze on TV.

Its exhausting.

So I found a few things from the last time that I was sick to motivate me to keep popping vitamin C's like sixlets. If you don't know what a sixlet is I am literally mourning over the fact that you had no childhood.

The last time I got sick I was pummeled to the ground by Strep Throat. Hell. Pure Hell. There is no adequate way to describe how horrible strep throat is; a picture is worth a thousand words and well... I think this pretty much sums it up.


Meet my 'happy place' basket.

The only time that I would crawl out of bed with comatose swagger was to visit this little guy. Which also happened to be the reason behind the crazy dreams I was having when I actually did catch some z's.

I also found a tribute that I had written while home sick:
  
My "Pro and Con" Ode to Strep Throat...

CON
Spending Valentines at an InstaCare with someone shoving a tongue depressor down my throat. Not quite the kind of action I was looking for on Valentines Day...

PRO
15 ml of LORTAB Elixir every 4-6 Hours

CON
Five Day Fever.

PRO
15 ml of LORTAB Elixir every 4-6 Hours

CON
Waking up at 12:33 a.m., 1:45 a.m., 3:27 a.m.,  4:13 a.m.,
6:00 a.m.,  etc... every day.

PRO
15 ml of LORTAB Elixir every 4-6 Hours

CON
Having the Angel of Death as a new roommate.

PRO
15 ml of LORTAB Elixir every 4-6 Hours

CON
Spending a three day weekend curled
up in bed.

PRO
15 ml of LORTAB Elixir every 4-6 Hours

CON
50 bones donated to Theraflu, Nyquill,
and prescriptions...

PRO
15 ml of LORTAB Elixir every 4-6 Hours


Moral of Post:
  • When you wake up in a cold sweat wondering if Angelina Jolie really did just steal a digeridoo from you in the middle of an IKEA parking lot, maybe you should cut back on the frequency of visits to your happy basket. Hypothetically speaking of course.

2 comments:

  1. best pro list ever. i mean, don't get me wrong, the illness sounds terrible but slap me with a couple of hydros and i'll be swimmin-n-singin-n-happy as damn calm!

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  2. I like your cons better. The Angel of Death sounds like a really cool roommate...I feel like he would like scary music though.

    Also, one time I was missing sixlets so bad that I ordered them online so that I would forget that I did it, and be SO pleasantly surprised when they showed up. It was so worth it. It was also by doing that that I learned you can order customized sixlets. I smell a party/wedding favor.

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